The Wondering Wanderers

Sunday 25 May

“Oh no, this traitorous sun finally shows up” I groaned as I plucked another pillowcase from the Washer

I unlocked the backdoor and stood by the balustrade. Enviously watching the flowers as the rising sun caressed their fragile petals. Standing there, I wished I was out by the seaside. And with that wish flooded in memories of last Sunday.

Sunday 18 May 

The pain in my knee was being quite mean. My body required this sleep as I had exerted it so much yesterday. Yet, the pain gnawed away with its chisel.

5:24am said my phone as I tapped it. And irrespective of all my attempts, I grudgingly crawled out by 5:45.

Every ligament in my body was taut. I could barely stand. 

“A walk will do you good and you get to see the sun rise” apparently, my head was not as sleepy as my body

Being barely few minutes to 6am, I knew I had missed that glorious moment. That instance when the sun shyly peers out behind the grey clouds. Then retreats and bursts out in all its orange glory. It is always magic.

Nevertheless, I stepped out. And soon as I opened the door, there, glittering in all her majesty was the sun! 

I walked towards the harbour and from the distance I saw them. A couple and their dog. They were far out into the waters through a backshore. I have always been curious about that stretch of land inside the waters. Although too wary to go out there alone as the tide is known to be tempestuous.

“I would like to go that far out into the sea too”

Immediately the idea dropped, my head stepped on and squashed it;

“You want to go out into the sea towards a strange couple with a dog? You seem to derive pleasure from recklessness”

“At least they could help if the tides come in. This is the first time I have seen others there and I want to capture this moment” my sleep-deprived mouth pouted 

While my head listed all the things which could go wrong, I saw my legs descending the stairs into the water. However, when I saw a blanket and some items behind the coastal walls, the red lights blazed again

“Homeless folks? What if they are killers?”

“Moss? What if I slip? What if I need to run away from them and cannot? Do I want to get my trainers dirty?

Meanwhile, as I walked inwards, they began to walk back to shore. 

“Hey we saw you coming and decided to walk back as we don’t know who you are and we got stuff there” It was the babe. She had a cheery smile. I really wonder how people get so cheery in the mornings. A time when some of us are still searching for our bearings

“Well, I saw you guys out here and although a bit wary, decided to come because I have never seen anyone here nor seen the tide this low”

We all laughed and began heading back.

In that split second, my judgemental church head noticed him smoking and clutching a half-full bottle of Spirits. It screamed danger. Like who smokes and drinks at 6am?

Lucy and Liam. 

They lived in the North End of the town but had come in to spend the night there.

“I have not been this way in years but I wanted to watch the sun rise” the five year old girl inside her beamed

“I do come occasionally. I mostly go that way’, I pointed over the Motorway

“Oh, I do go this other way. Towards the birdhouse” she laughed. 

“Yes, I also go that way sometimes. Thing is, I vary my routes spontaneously”

Turns out Lucy is a medic who works in this place where I use their services. We both have sons of the same age who also happen to have no siblings. She has a Nigerian colleague whom she finds very intriguing and did some mimicking of some Nigerianese

After my confession of being terrified of dogs, they encouraged me to pet their dog. 

“I need to run now. I have to be in church”

“Oh, you go to church? What time do you have to be there?” Liam piped in.

“My colleague goes to church too. Every Sunday” responded Lucy 

“Where is your Church? Liam chipped in

“Wow, so many questions”. I laughed backing off

“Do you go to church? I fired back

“No. This is our church here, we are worshipping right here” Liam spanned his hands across the expanse of the sea

“I hate organized religion. I think it is the cause of all wars” Lucy retorted as she explained further

“I don’t have anything against churches though. I used to attend as a child but stopped years back after I prayed for a sick dog and God didn’t answer.

“I went as a child. But I stopped after my mom died of breast cancer. Although I still think Faith is a fantastic thing. It is great knowing you got someone who got your back and you can always run to, irrespective of anything”

At this point, this Nigerian Christian who was cooked inside the Church took off my church scarf. I needed an open head for the flow of this conversation. 

Our highly hypocritical religious society back home, does not encourage these sorts of candid conversations. Actually, God’s handlers delighted in shutting such views down. Such opinions were an affront on their Charge and he was too queasy to stomach such questions. 

That left the pubs and clubs as the only acceptable places you could be real. There, seated amongst like-minds, smoking, drinking and frolicking, it didn’t matter if you were also a custodian of the Faith, you could take off your mask and not be ashamed.

“Let her go” Lucy admonished Liam who was by now in charge of the conversation. She sat on the blanket while he stood by my side engrossed 

“We do not want her to be late to church”

“No. It is totally alright” I waved her off. I am enjoying this conversation”. Moreso, if I invite you to church will you come? 

At that point, I could gladly have staved off church for this seaside fellowship 

“You said something about your mom, cancer and your step dad. I had breast cancer too and I ……..”. Lucy sprang up, came and enveloped me in a hug as I recounted my ordeal

“Oh no, I cannot imagine what you went through. How did you pull through that?”

Pointing at Liam, I said “My faith in God. That was one thing which kept me grounded. Like you mentioned, knowing that this one person got you when your world was falling apart. It wasn’t that easy anyway, because I came close to losing it or ending it all a few times. I honestly have no idea how those with no Faith walk through such a treacherous road with no anchor . I confessed

Now, we were standing in a ring

“Look at these” Liam pulled up his sleeves and showed me the marks. He was a self harmer. The empath in me struggled with a poker face.

Living in this UK among a people who do not wear their hearts on their sleeves, is tasking for an African. 

“ I get it when you say you almost came close a few times” He caressed his wrists as he stood talking. And that is why I did say it is a wonderful thing to go through things knowing there is this one person who would never leave you no matter what”

I couldn’t understand how my Sunday morning had gone from grudgingly getting off my bed to standing by the seaside in this rich fellowship with total strangers. It was not even 8am yet I felt like this was church.

“Would you come to church if I invite you?

Exchange of glances. Head shakes.

“The thing is my boy is too intelligent. He also knows that the church is the cause of all the world’s problems and..

“Bring him to church and leave the rest. My church has kids’ groups for all ages. He will meet his mates. Do not worry about his anger, questions or cynicism. let him bring them and his mates will sort him out”

As Lucy embraced me one more time I requested for a photo. Taking a shot of our legs

“I am a Writer and would likely share this story online. However, I will not show your faces as I am big on anonymity”

“No, that’s okay. We don’t care. you can show our faces. let’s take photos”

“Nay. I can’t. I didn’t wash my face before leaving home” I placed my hands over my face

“Me neither. Not washed my face and who cares? Lucy again in that her devil-may-care attitude. Handing her phone to Liam and asking him to get a good background without the blazing sun

She added me straight away on Facebook. Another hug, and a handshake from Liam with a promise to keep in touch for a hangout then I began climbing the stairs upwards. 

But did I feel like leaving?

Nope. I stood on the outer side of the wall by the other side and peered down at them. Our conversation was so engaging that you wonder how people miss out on connecting with others due to baseless reservations. Liam was nothing like the picture in my head.

What just happened?

I felt like I have been given a gift. A window to view the vulnerabilities of these strangers. That hunger inside Liam. The questions erupting from that boy who lost his mother to cancer. The man who didn’t believe in God but was socially-conscious enough not to want his drink showing in the image. The confusion. The knowledge. 

Lucy, the medic, who felt that God is a fraud.

There was no lure to step away from there. My head buzzed. These two here were the Church. They were the reason Jesus came. So that every wanderer could bring in their wondering soul and have their questions asked out loud

Unfortunately, in my background and culture, these are the type we are advised to stay away from. We disdain as they do not fit our mold. The rough looking man in matted dreads, smoking a cigar and hugging a half drunk bottle of spirit at dawn on a Sunday morning.

The woman who should be herding her son off to church this early on Sunday.

Standing there, my late father’s voice drifted over the wind. A man who had a deep faith in God that was filled with the sort of questions Organised religion disliked. 

“This form of Christianity which teaches extremity, are we sure we are getting it right?” was his constant 

The questions kept buzzing around me as my lethargic steps plodded home.

And this morning, standing by the window, soaking in the sun rise, all I could think of were those two.