“I feel like my cancer has not really gone away. I see it as a tiger lurking under the tree close by and waiting to pounce on me. So it keeps me on edge not knowing when I would cross paths with her or when she would pounce”
Most people around the table nodded in comprehension.
I had goosebumps. It was such a strong analogy. Painfully vivid and disempowering.
I felt angry at such a burden. As if the initial attack by cancer is not enough, now you carry the extra burden of tiptoeing through life. And that anxiety for me, is even worse than the attack.
However, do you know how most cancer warriors get into such a state?
Because of you! That seemingly harmless word you thoughtlessly toss around.
“My mother was in remission for xx years then the cancer came back”
“I have a friend that had cancer. But is now in remission”
“My greatgrandpa had cancer and went into remission 4 more times before he died”
“My sister’s cancer went away and came back but she could not survive it”
“My colleague was in remission from cancer but died when she went for a surgery”
‘Remission’.
What does it even mean?
Not sure I have heard it outside of cancer.
Well, I checked the Cambridge Dictionary:
a period of time when an illness is less severe or is not affecting someone: Her cancer has been in remission for several years.
While the Cleveland Clinic says:
The term “remission” means that cancer treatment reduced or eliminated the symptoms and signs of cancer. Remission may last for months, years or the rest of your life. Remission may not mean you’re free of cancer (cured), but it’s an important turning point for you and your cancer care team
Implicit in that word is the subtle presupposition……..”well, don’t get too comfortable now”
However, as a believer who has contended with cancer and won. I find that word both limiting and untrue
At what point in the discovery of cancer and evolution of man did someone subtly sneak that word into our subconscious? Why is there yet no word like ‘healing’ in Cancer’s Register?
One of the programmes my family enjoy on BBC is ‘Horrible Histories’. There was this episode about when the first man discovered farming. His fellows were running around chasing animals for food and saw him not joining them.
“Why are you not chasing animals, what will you eat?” They asked him
“Oh, I started farming. I now grow my own food” he said
They stopped briefly in consternation to listen as he explained what it means to grow food and its benefits. How you can then chose to go chasing animals when you want to, not because you have to.
Well, as always happens, some curiously stayed behind to learn more. While others zoomed off that he was talking gibberish. Even after he showed them his harvested vegetables and ate some right in front of them.
“It did not taste right” was what they said as they zoomed off to chase animals
Today, the rest is history. Hunting went from being a survival activity to sport for us. While today, man is fighting man to stop hunting & eating animals.
The power of Evolution and Choices.
How did cancer become such a dreaded word? At what point in history was it determined that while other illnesses can leave and stay away, we have to prepare a table and await cancer’s return?
Are you in remission after you
- have a headache, take the pills and it goes away?
- Have COVID which goes away?
- get into an accident, have a limb amputated, get treated and discharged?
Ask yourself these questions:
- Has technology evolved from when medicine had limited knowledge about Cancer?
- Could your neighbor who died 50 years ago have survived today?
Curiosity has always sparked change & transformation as man evolved. Could there be a different way? Can you rethink your beliefs? can my belief system benefit from an upgrade? Can I doubt my beliefs?
How about swapping ‘healing’ & ‘cured’ for ‘remission’?
As a follower of Christ who have faced off with cancer, I chose to daily renew my mind. I transform my thought life by building fresh neural pathways. These include mapping over mental images of actual survivors who have been healed for decades
And why do you even own the cancer?
“my cancer!”
How can something which happened to you become yours?
This article I wrote last week talked about roots. I shared a story on how a single leaf I mindlessly plunked into a bottle is becoming a plant. Then drew an analogy on how our thoughts take roots. see post here
Our words are seeds. They deposit thoughts which then take roots. I have seen powerfully grounded roots. They spread, dig in, reinforce and became strong enough to threaten foundations of buildings.
When next you see someone who has faced off with cancer, can you intentionally empower them by using ‘healed’ instead of ‘remission’?
Selah.