Embracing Vulnerability: Reimagining the Relationship with God in Trials

Public Relations =  the stealth art of making something/someone appear presentably acceptable to the eyes of others. [amara nnaji 2024]

 It was the evening of the first day of #newwineunited24.   A  Christian camping festival in England held weekly every summer.   2024 has attracted 14k worshippers of all ages across the Globe.

My church family arrived early and all hands came together to unpack and pitch our tents. With nothing else to do than watch other campers set up,   my feet went exploring.  This was my first time at the Shepton Mallet campground and I like knowing my environment.

 

My eyes saw the Food court then my legs followed.  After settling for a Greek Gyro, I went into the centre housing the bookshop and another  charity I recognised from last year where a Cafe had also been set up.  The coffee queue was lengthening.

Food in hand, I nestled into a sofa by the corner which had two others sitting around.  I was enjoying the quiet.

Then I saw them walk to a table with their coffee cups.  My people.

I went to join them and eventually, the conversation steered.

“Lamentations” Bill said tentatively.  We all turned towards his voice. Bill had driven into camp after we set up and was unpacking his tent before I stepped out

“I want to know the place of Lamentations in the Bible. How do you respond to God or react when you are stuck deep down in mire” he spread his hands 

“How do you mean? Phil sat up straighter.  He was the oldest of us chronologically and I have come to know that he was also knowledgeable in the faith

“I am in this Christian group where someone posted his rage at God about all he has been going through. Then another  responded with James 1:2. which says count it all joy”

“I am pretty confused myself because I am currently going through one of the worst periods of my life and I am torn between being real and telling God how I feel and chinning up,  he elaborated

At that instant, my admiration for Bill soared.  Here was this man’s man being as vulnerable as a child

“I think everyone goes through stuff.   However, my issue with some people is stopping to pitch camp and throw a party while going through the valley of the shadow of death” Phil remonstrated

“So does that mean we have no recourse to talk to God? I am against such belief and tired of having people guilt trip me for wanting to express myself”

“I do not have much to say on this theology especially as I am new in my faith walk” said Gem the professor who only recently reconnected with her faith 

Chewing my Gyro, I bit a smile into the insides of my cheek.

“You must keep your rebel thoughts to yourself amara and not pollute others” I chided me.  Aware of how unconventional some of my own beliefs are, I limit expression to certain circles only. Although plodding through the terrain of cancer has made me care more about using my voice than assuaging people’s emotions.

“Well, look at Job. He was a perfect example for us and I think we all know that irrespective of whatever, God is good” Phil remarked again. 

And that was when I stopped chewing my cheeks. Enough of Church people and this ‘Job perfect picture’.  Here was a male in his 50s, man enough to discard his male pride cloak and reach out for help.  I was not going to simply sit down and allow another person spring the boys don’t cry crap.  Besides, the issue here was not God’s goodness.

“I am not a Job person”. I piped in

All eyes turned to me.

“I used to be a Job-follower.  Moreso, I grew up among Muslims so I know about fatalism, stoicism and all that crap about not crying out while being flogged”

“Nevertheless, I am super grateful that …….part 2

 

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